Monday, July 31, 2006

I'm wearing a tie.

For the first time in a year, I'm clean shaven,i'm wearing a pair of ironed pants and a shirt and tie. I'm sitting in front of a computer, surrounded by files, paper and photocopiers, in a dusty basement office on my own. I'm getting paid to do this. I have absolutely no clue what i'm meant to be doing. So far, i've spun around on my chair, I've photocopied an invoice. Then worried that it was a confidential invoice (from the watercooler company) and shredded it. Then photocopied it again. (just in case)

Then I emptied the shredder, and covered the office in a thin layer of finely shredded secrets.

Then I got an email from my boss.
Andrew,
can you order more toilet paper.
Regards,
(Boss)

So, i rang the toilet paper people, and said:
'can i have some toilet rolls? i'm not sure if we have an account.
and they went 'yes'. and yes.
and i hung up
and I stared into space.

Wednesday, July 26, 2006

Touched down in the middle of the pouring rain...

...in the land of the delta blues.

Or, more accurately, touched down in the middle of the blazing sun, in the land of the breakfast roll. So i'm home from the travelling. (Read all about that here!) And rather than worrying about whether or not I'm going to make the next flight, or if that man in front of me is going to steal my kidneys, I've a whole new set of worries.

I worry, like. Anyway, the main current worry is that I'm having trouble reverting back to RealLife me. Travel me is so much more fun. He drinks! Swears! is antisocial! and sleazy! RealLife me just says things like 'i need to jog more' or 'traffic is terrible today'.

What'll happen when these two kooky characters come together in one bald shell?

Watch Afterbumble! only on Fox.